Archive for Facilitator Trainer – Page 2

Are You Ready to Create?

Posted by on
 November 10, 2011
  · 6 Comments

I was given as assignment from my coach to really target the people that I want in our new Creation Circles.  I started writing and with the help of the amazing Jessica Belbin this is what I came up with.

If you have EVER had a transformative experience please read this and comment if it resonates with you and your experience. Thanks in advance.
You have had a transformative experience in your life. In other words that: ‘life changing event’, a moment of Self-Realization, an “Ah-Ha moment”, the light bulb came on, Holy shit, breath stealing, Experience of Truth… moment.

Through this moment and afterwards you re-realized your Self Worth and as a result stopped reaching for the bag of Doritos (chips, cookies, ice cream, smokes, and / or glass of… watching late-night T.V. (porn on your lap top, shopping to fill the void, filling your day with ‘to do’s’, consistently satisfying everyone else first, Googling your life away) AND INSTEAD decided you were worth speaking your heart, being who you really are and doing the things in life YOU actually, truly WANTED to do.

After this moment, for at least a while and maybe still:

You dedicated yourself to growing…

You kept your momentum….

You achieved successes beyond what you ever thought possible…

You committed to your ongoing journey…

Yahoo! – (insert back flips here) – That f***ing rocks, and you deserve acknowledgement for that!

But then perhaps, and often enough, comes ‘The Gap’.

What is ‘The Gap’?
You know very well what the gap is. You wish you didn’t, but you do.

It’s the place of no longer playing the small game you used to play. But you sure as hell are not playing the game that is possible, you are not even close to living the life you can be, do and have. You know this because you saw it, you lived it for a while, then it fell away. But you can’t see a way to achieve the life you KNOW that you can have. This uncomfortable, frustrating, depressing, trapped, heavy, painful place has led to feelings of ‘blaming them’ or ‘blaming yourself’ or for a few- ‘no blame, but damn this is slow’…

The true crime with these perceptions is that they mortally wound your capacity to create. Choosing these perspectives breeds resistance and casts you in the darkness and stagnation of victimization. They are choices that lead to you selling yourself on some version of settling into your ‘life of less’. The Truth Hurts…

Are you still hurting?
Frustrated?
Or have you gone numb?

This is where most people stay stuck, between Self-blame victim:
“What’s wrong with me?” or “I suck because everyone else seems to get what they want but I can’t.” and External blame victim: “That organization, course, facilitator, book, info product, etc. took advantage of me and sold me something that doesn’t work in the real world.” or “I’ve tried my best with it. It just doesn’t work.” But lets make no mistake about it, both positions are victim.

A lucky few actually get to a spot of personal accountability, they get to live their dreams, lose weight, start families, run a successful business…

But often, even there, it feels like its going at a snails pace. It takes some time for our reality to catch up with our glimpse of our transformed self.

So we know you. We see you. Our heart goes out to you. That glimpse you had can be real… You just need a different approach! Transformation is not a program, it is not a course, it is not your 6 month series with your personal coach, it’s not your audios on your ipod and it is not all of your shelf help books.

At the Creators Code we know it does not really matter what course(s) you have taken, what journey to Machu Picchu, Nepal, etc. you have done, what guru you have touched, etc. Because..

We know that these are all just different paths to the same destination, which is acknowledging that:

You are a creator. You are a divine reflection of God. A spark of spirit. A part of the Universe. You have the capacity to create and sustain that transformation for yourself, you family, your community and yes, ultimately the world.

You are here for a reason. There is something within you that you are called to create and it’s long past due.

Your tribe is calling, are you coming?

If you are in ‘The Gap’, you are there simply because the elements for guaranteeing success are not in your life and you probably did not know what they were.

Real transformation takes 3 things in addition to your transformative experience(s) – The elements are stunningly simple but incredibly elusive: The three R’s Relate, Reframe, repeat.

Reframe your way of thinking: In case you haven’t noticed this is impossible to do while you are stuck in your own gap. It’s like being trapped in a box and the instructions for how to get out are on the outside, someone has to come along and read them to you and help you get out.

Relate: When in the gap, we attract people that reinforce our current experience and those beliefs that we have had since we were 3 years old (and again in case you haven’t noticed, that is not helping). What is required to sustain change is surrounding yourself with people who get and believe in your vision in yourself and your life. People who have walked the path and done it before you and people who look to you for inspiration and whom you step up to support. That is the way.

Repeat, Repeat, Repeat!. Neuro-Science says it takes hearing something 7 times before the neural network can even hold the idea or the possibility. But that is probably 100,000 times less than what is necessary to translate that idea into a real, tangible, sustained experience or result in your life. How many times have the messages of ‘small you’ been repeated? One of the single largest benefits of your Creation Circle is they will repeat to you over and over ‘You can’, ‘You deserve this’, ‘Its time you came here to create this’, and perhaps most importantly going back to relate ‘We’ll help!

All of these elements are what you will find in your Creation Circle!

There is no end point. There is no ‘straight line’ that anyone stays on. The truth is… the more growth, ‘ah-has’ and ‘Holy shit’ moments on the journey – the better.

Live a life of continuous purpose, clarity and contribution.

But;

Perhaps your pride says it’s impossible. Your experience says it’s risky. Your intellect says it’s pointless. But your heart says give it a try. Participating in a Creation Circle amplifies the Whisper of your Heart.
Step into (again) the magic and flow of creation! You know that within you there is SOMETHING that YOU MUST CREATE. You know with cellular certainty there is something within you that given the right environment, the correct support, the appropriate space YOU WILL MANIFEST YOUR HEARTS DESIRES:

Why Now?

• Really? Have you looked around the world lately?
• Better yet…

• Pause…
• Wait…
• Breathe…

Listen to the Whisper of your Heart …

Categories : Coaching, Entrepreneurship, Life and Random Thoughts, The Creators Code
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3 Keys to Creating Great Workshops and Seminars

Posted by on
 January 6, 2011
  · 6 Comments

We have all been there, a workshop or seminar that we ate truly fascinated by the topic and happy to be there. At the front of the room is a talented and gifted program leader with great wisdom and content to share. Then it begins to fall apart.

The program does not start on time. When it does it does not seem to be really purposeful. The facilitator get in a fight with the easel trying to flip paper. The leader gives directions to an activity that has 15 steps you and the rest of the group are confused and no one does anything. Or the instructions are clear but they do not give you any time to actually do the activity or make sure that everyone gets a chance to participate. Or one of my favorites is sitting there watching them read from a manual, good god I can read!! The list goes on and on and on. Again the material is great, the facilitator is brilliant in their area of expertise but the experience is diminished by their lack of training and knowledge in designing and delivering small and large group facilitated experiences.

It really is a crime because it costs tremendously: it costs value for the participants, it costs credibility for the program leader, it costs money for the organization in terms of ongoing sales.

Facilitating skills are NOT that complex or difficult but there are not that many places to learn them from people with significant experience.

I have trained and supported hundreds of facilitators to design, market and deliver their own programs over the past 20 years and I want to share my top 3 training tips with you.

1) Do your own work! Do your own work! Did I mention do your own work? The number of times I have seen people present material that they were not completely grounded on personally is scary! Please note I have worked primarily in the personal transformation industry where this is even more significant than in other arenas but it is vital everywhere. You MUST live your content to the best of your abilities or don’t bother.

2) Be clear about your motive, yea, yea I know you want to save the world, help people less fortunate than you, of course. However until you tell yourself the truth about ego and attention needs you will have great difficulty succeeding. Here is a little secret. EVERY facilitator/program leader who has ever stood on a stage has high (some super high) attention needs. It is part if what attracts them to the business. Significance, attention, needing to be needed, love, adoration superiority again the list can go on and on. Please understand these are pretty basic human needs, having the needs are not the issue…pretending being at the front of the room is a selfless act is an issue of epic proportions.

3) Overlooking basic skills. Usually under the erroneous view of the material and message is so valuable that the details do not matter. That is not true! Hire someone who has experience get a mentor who has designed content get the basic skills handled for you and your clients. It is not hard you just need the support!

As I am writing this I am getting flashbacks to a variety of crazy things that I have seen novice facilitators do that caused programs to suffer and in some cases outright fail. Please do not be one of those, the truth is the world needs you and your gift, there is greater demand for adult education today than ever before. Do what it takes to support yourself to succeed.

My core company Personal Best Seminars has been providing transformational seminars including Facilitator Development for over 20 years, we have over 30,000 graduates who tell us regularly that our programs are the best organized and delivered that they have ever experienced.

Due to a ton of requests I have created an Accelerated Facilitator Training program that starts late May. If you are interested contact me directly at jfiset@me.com

Jay

Categories : Coaching, Entrepreneurship, Thou Shall Not Work
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Book Excerpt “How Did You Learn To Blame?”

Posted by on
 December 28, 2010
  · 3 Comments

What You Resist Persists

One of the immutable laws of the universe is that you get more of whatever you focus on or give energy to. If you think hard about how you don’t want to be victimized, you can actually attract victim experiences into your life!

Your brain or belief system doesn’t hear or register the negative words like “don’t”. Try telling yourself, Don’t think of a red car.” An image of a red car will flash in your mind. So, by saying, “I don’t want any more victim experiences,” you are actually giving victim experiences energy and you will attract more of them into your life.

Notice what you are resisting. This is the foundation of becoming more conscious in your life. (NOTE: If you have not read Law of Attraction by Michael Losier, I highly recommend it as one of the clearest and simplest explanations of how what you resist persists works.)

 

Societies Are Based on Victimization
Society teaches us to be victimized. We have been taught that deciding who is responsible is essential, and that, whatever goes wrong, there is someone some-where to blame and even to sue. Our whole legal system is founded on this concept.
I challenge you to watch or listen to one complete newscast and not hear directly or indirectly that some-one or something is to blame for the woes described. There is a talk radio host in Calgary who regularly asks his woe-of-the-day guest, “Who is to blame for your problem?” or, even better, “Who can we blame?” In-variably, the Victim has a long list. To be fair, this same host also asks what can be done to fix the problem. However, usually much more time and energy is spent on directing blame than on resolving the issues.

 

Our society has become skilled in establishing blame (victimization), often from the moment of conception:

  • She didn’t take her pills.
  • The condom broke.
  • I couldn’t interrupt the mood.
  • She trapped me.

And, all too often, it continues from there. In fact, one could argue that blame and victimization have sur-rounded us virtually from the beginning of history.

 

Genesis 3:11
And they heard the voice of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day; and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden. And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, “Where art thou?” And he said, “I heard Thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” And He said, “Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou should not eat?

 

This direct questioning by the Lord appears to have made our first parents very uneasy. Adam could have offered any number of reasons or excuses why he took the fruit. He could have said, Gee, the sun was in my eyes, so I couldn’t see what I was eating Or possibly a modern-day Adam would offer this justification: Sure I took a bite, but I didn’t swallow.

 

What would I expect Adam to say to this man who walked and talked with God, someone who held the honored position of being the first human on earth? I wish he had said, “I was wrong. I’m sorry. I will never do it again.”

 

Instead, listen to Adam’s immediate response, “The woman thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree. Adam is rationalizing his sinful behavior, trying to shift the responsibility to his wife, Eve. At this point, Eve has an opportunity to be a better human than Adam. However, her response to the same questioning is, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat. Pretty lame. The ten-dency of mortals to deny Personal Accountability seems to be evident from the very beginning.

 

Here is an interesting example of modern-day learning to blame. Close friends of ours have three kids. The middle child, Luke, is full of piss and vinegar like most boys. Luke loves skateboarding and gets a skate-board at the ripe old age of three. His Mom, however, is not quite as keen about the skateboard, because she is concerned that Luke will hurt himself. So she sits him down and talks to him about the dangers of skateboarding, reviews all of the safety equipment, and makes him promise to be careful. All is good up to this point. Then the inevitable happens. Luke has a dirty wipeout and scrapes up his face. He doesn’t cry and doesn’t run to tell his Mom because he knows that she will be even less willing to let him continue skateboarding. But Mom has witnessed the wipeout. Later that day, Mom asks Luke what happened to his face. His answer floors her.

 

To cover up his skateboarding drama, Luke decides that it is better to say that his older sister hit him! He has grown up in an honest and accountable house-hold, yet, at age three, he has already figured out that blaming someone else for his mishaps can provide him with a payoff and a protection. In this case, it did not work, but it does often enough in general, and he was sure willing to try.

 

Activity Learning to Blame
How did you learn to blame? What is your earliest recollection of blaming someone else? Were there any specific people or events that set up your patterns of blame? To learn more about Personal Accountability visit: http://www.personalbestseminars.com

Categories : Coaching, My Best Selling Book
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Thou Shall Not Work…For Someone Else

Posted by on
 March 30, 2010
  · No Comments

I have been toying around with a book that I think is fun and squarely takes aim at the old industrial revolution beliefs of go to school, get a job, save for retirement and all will be well.

Thou Shall Not Work…For Someone Else, The 10 Commandments of Entrepreneurship.  I am going to start blogging my thoughts and notes for the book.  Please feel free to comment, share your point of view and let me know how you make out “Living the commandments”  ; )

The first draft of the 10 Commandments of Entrepreneurship


1) Thou shall create value

2) Thou shall be sustainable in all endeavours

3) Thou shall build to scale

4) Thou shall become addicted to education

5) Thou shall release your limiting beliefs

6) Thou shall give, you will become a new breed of Philanthropreneur

7) Thou shall not create false economies

8) Thou shall create more than you consume

9) Thou shall focus exclusively on that which only YOU can do

10) What do you think it should be???

I have about 5 others that are on my list but I would love to hear what the rest of you think.  What do you think should be one of the Commandments of Entrepreneurship?

Categories : Coaching, Entrepreneurship, Thou Shall Not Work
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Social Media and Your Business

Posted by on
 March 18, 2010
  · 17 Comments

Wyatt’s 4 year old pictures, I cannot get over how fast he is growing.

The other day he comes into my office hand on his hip and says “Daddy, do I have to have a nap today?” I say yes, Wyatt, “Well I think it should be my personal choice, and I choose no nap!”

I am SO happy we started teaching him about choice so young!  ; )





Last weekend in the Entrepreneurs Bootcamp I was making a point about using Facebook and a few of the attendees literally rolled their eyes.

Another participant says “I know what you mean, but you must think of it as a business tool”

I must say my internal response was nothing short of “Duh!”  Upon reflection however I can see how my grounding and view of Facebook and others view can be quite different!

  1. I choose to get on Facebook for the purpose of communicating with my tribe, developing and reinforcing business relationships.

  2. I clearly choose to ignore the games, the mafia, the farms and the other time wasters (yes I own my judgment).

  3. My life and business are very clearly highly integrated, I know that is not the case for most people who have a job.

The point of this post is simply this, if you have a business you really should be on Facebook (and other social media for that matter).  It is NOT the way of the future it is the way it is NOW!

SIDEBAR:  Here is the wild and entertaining reality, this just happened literally as I was writing this blog.  I get this email via Facebook.

XXXXXXXX March 19, 2010 at 7:01pm
Subject: bootcamp

Hi Jay,
How much for the bootcamp?
xo
lisa

Now what is funny about this is that she could have contacted me in a multitude of ways but she choose to do it via Facebook….interesting. If you are one of the holdouts, please take my word for it.  Get after it…NOW!!

Steps:

Get a Facebook Account

Get a fan page for you and your business

Start communicating and contributing value it will transform your business!

If you have not already checked out my newest fan page for The GrowOp…if you don’t know what it is you gotta check it out.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-GrowOp/391264820289?ref=ts

Categories : Coaching, Entrepreneurship
Tags : , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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