Archive for Personal Best Seminars – Page 4

Is Wayne Dyer Really a Sex Maniac?

Does This Man Look Like a Sex Maniac to You?

Given that Personal Best is sponsoring the upcoming Wayne Dyer event in Calgary on May 17th 2011, I thought that I would share an embarrassing tidbit from my past, and how Wayne Dyer had huge (if unintended) impact on me, my life and my career.

Imagine me about 1980, 13 years old, fascinated by anything and everything sex. For perspective Oprah had a expert that says that males have an image or thought about sex or sexual stimulation every three seconds. Now I know that many people that that is an exaggeration, however I think for me as a teenage boy it was a gross underestimation…perhaps they just said it wrong, it was supposed to be 3 times a second. Now that is getting closer to the truth, but I digress.

I am 13 years old and in my Mom’s bedroom and and there I see on her bedside table a SEX book! Now I should tell you that my family has always been very open about sex and sexuality and that her leaving a book about sex out was well within the realm of possible.

It’s title was even perfectly clear “Your Erogenous Zones” and it was complete with a picture of a sex maniac who had clearly just been left very satisfied!

Well obviously I HAD to read this book it was going to tell me all I needed to know about the hidden erotic and sexy spots that every 13 year old boy on a mission needed to know.

As open as my family was about sex, I did not feel right asking to borrow the book, so I took to going into my mom’s room while she was at work and reading “Your Erogenous Zones” sitting on the floor hidden by the bed so I could quickly replace the book on her bedside table and get out of her room when I heard her come home.

At the time I considered myself a pretty smart kid, but I must tell you that I was more than a little confused by this book. Where were the sexy parts? What are the locations of the female body that drive them wild? It must be in here…somewhere. So I keep reading and reading and reading and reading. I cannot tell you the number of times I looked at the cover, reread the title and looked into the freshly satisfied sex maniac’s face, each time thinking “well the sex stuff has to be in here somewhere”.

In the entire book I can honestly say I learned nothing about sex. However I did learn quite alot about what motivates me and other people, and it did help me navigate my teen years, my parents divorce and dare I say even helped me get laid ; ) I will be forever grateful to Wayne for planting seeds that germinated and sprouted 5 years later when I took Personal Best Seminars and ultimately influenced my career path, Thank you Wayne!

If only I was as interested in the dictionary when I was 13, I could have simply looked up the word erroneous and saved myself plenty of reading and I could have spent all that time chasing girls!

On a serious note, Wayne has been a thought leader for over 35 years, it is a privilege to be in his presence and hear him speak. Get your tickets at http://www.ticketmaster.ca and save 10% using our code PERSONALBEST

PS: When I talk to him at the VIP session I am going to ask him for some sex tips, he has got to have some, look at that picture!

Jay

The Creators Code


An Early Rendering of The Creators Code Logo


I have been perking and making notes about a new book called The Creators Code.

Actually much more than a book, more of a movement.  A global movement of conscious creators.  I know, I know, a global movement sounds on one hand overwhelming and daunting and on the other hand almost cliche.  Yet for month and months I have been pulled to this.  So I thought that I would share some of my thoughts about The Code and ask for your feedback.

I am going to start with the book that I will write/video here on my blog in short segments and will ask for your feedback and suggestions along the way.

The fundamental concept is very simple, we can divide people into 2 basic categories; Creators and Consumers.  Now clearly we are ALL both, BUT in the big picture of our lives where do we “net out” ? On any given day, week, month, quarter, year as individuals do we actually consume more or create more?

Make no mistake this is difficult to measure and perhaps we will never have an ideal way to measure, but the question is powerful, if you let it sink in for a minute…it is a biggie.

In your relationships, work, family home, do you create more or consume more?

In your business in terms of value do you create or consume more?

In all aspects of your life do you create or consume more?

The answers to these questions tell us a tremendous amount about ourselves, our lives, our communities and ultimately the long term sustainability of everything we touch.  I know, I am getting a bit dramatic.

However I believe with every cell of my being that we as human beings are manifestation machines, we are creators, we create with every thought, every action, every interaction that we have with another human being.  If we can consciously direct that creation energy, we can dramatically improve our lives, our communities and our world.

Think of it from this perspective, facebook now has almost 600 Million users, the average user is logged into facebook for 2 hours a day (note that does not mean that they are using fb that entire time).  MOST of the people are consuming information about people they know, or would like to know. That is 1.2 billion hours a day globally that is primarily wasted away in unconscious consumption of primarily useless information.

I am aware that fb can be used for some amazing creation, I believe for example that in terms of fb hours I would “net out” at huge creation for my business and contribution to my clients lives.

But lets be clear is there probably a higher and better use of (lets round down) 1 billion man hours a day on planet earth and I believe that if each of us was clear about what it is that we wanted to create, and got our own personal stories and limitations out of the way it would be an amazing experience personally and quite literally globally.

Claiming the space of creator is the prerequisite of everything, designing your ideal business, financial freedom, loving relationships, mastering your weight and health, connecting with your family and loved ones.

So here is my first run at The Code itself, which will be the framework of the book.

The Creators Code

  1. I create more than I consume
  2. I am the source and cause of my experiences and results
  3. I am grateful for who I am and what I have. I know the experience of gratitude is the space of creation
  4. I understand my needs and get them met so I can create from a clean clear space
  5. I am an active learner and teacher, I pass on my knowledge
  6. I align my life and resources around my passion and gifts
  7. I have a spiritual pracitice
  8. I live a life of abundance and generosity
  9. I understand and support entrepreneurship either as one myself or I work for one I believe in
  10. I nurture and care for my body and health, I know it is one of my most powerful tools for creation.
  11. I support sustainability and vote consistently with all my resources
  12. I embrace personal accountability
  13. I believe in democracy and freedom for all, and participate locally and globally

That is where I am at with the code thus far, I welcome any of your feedback and ideas.

Standing in support of creators.

Jay


Price Objections

3 Keys to Creating Great Workshops and Seminars

We have all been there, a workshop or seminar that we ate truly fascinated by the topic and happy to be there. At the front of the room is a talented and gifted program leader with great wisdom and content to share. Then it begins to fall apart.

The program does not start on time. When it does it does not seem to be really purposeful. The facilitator get in a fight with the easel trying to flip paper. The leader gives directions to an activity that has 15 steps you and the rest of the group are confused and no one does anything. Or the instructions are clear but they do not give you any time to actually do the activity or make sure that everyone gets a chance to participate. Or one of my favorites is sitting there watching them read from a manual, good god I can read!! The list goes on and on and on. Again the material is great, the facilitator is brilliant in their area of expertise but the experience is diminished by their lack of training and knowledge in designing and delivering small and large group facilitated experiences.

It really is a crime because it costs tremendously: it costs value for the participants, it costs credibility for the program leader, it costs money for the organization in terms of ongoing sales.

Facilitating skills are NOT that complex or difficult but there are not that many places to learn them from people with significant experience.

I have trained and supported hundreds of facilitators to design, market and deliver their own programs over the past 20 years and I want to share my top 3 training tips with you.

1) Do your own work! Do your own work! Did I mention do your own work? The number of times I have seen people present material that they were not completely grounded on personally is scary! Please note I have worked primarily in the personal transformation industry where this is even more significant than in other arenas but it is vital everywhere. You MUST live your content to the best of your abilities or don’t bother.

2) Be clear about your motive, yea, yea I know you want to save the world, help people less fortunate than you, of course. However until you tell yourself the truth about ego and attention needs you will have great difficulty succeeding. Here is a little secret. EVERY facilitator/program leader who has ever stood on a stage has high (some super high) attention needs. It is part if what attracts them to the business. Significance, attention, needing to be needed, love, adoration superiority again the list can go on and on. Please understand these are pretty basic human needs, having the needs are not the issue…pretending being at the front of the room is a selfless act is an issue of epic proportions.

3) Overlooking basic skills. Usually under the erroneous view of the material and message is so valuable that the details do not matter. That is not true! Hire someone who has experience get a mentor who has designed content get the basic skills handled for you and your clients. It is not hard you just need the support!

As I am writing this I am getting flashbacks to a variety of crazy things that I have seen novice facilitators do that caused programs to suffer and in some cases outright fail. Please do not be one of those, the truth is the world needs you and your gift, there is greater demand for adult education today than ever before. Do what it takes to support yourself to succeed.

My core company Personal Best Seminars has been providing transformational seminars including Facilitator Development for over 20 years, we have over 30,000 graduates who tell us regularly that our programs are the best organized and delivered that they have ever experienced.

Due to a ton of requests I have created an Accelerated Facilitator Training program that starts late May. If you are interested contact me directly at jfiset@me.com

Jay

Book Excerpt “How Did You Learn To Blame?”

What You Resist Persists

One of the immutable laws of the universe is that you get more of whatever you focus on or give energy to. If you think hard about how you don’t want to be victimized, you can actually attract victim experiences into your life!

Your brain or belief system doesn’t hear or register the negative words like “don’t”. Try telling yourself, Don’t think of a red car.” An image of a red car will flash in your mind. So, by saying, “I don’t want any more victim experiences,” you are actually giving victim experiences energy and you will attract more of them into your life.

Notice what you are resisting. This is the foundation of becoming more conscious in your life. (NOTE: If you have not read Law of Attraction by Michael Losier, I highly recommend it as one of the clearest and simplest explanations of how what you resist persists works.)

 

Societies Are Based on Victimization
Society teaches us to be victimized. We have been taught that deciding who is responsible is essential, and that, whatever goes wrong, there is someone some-where to blame and even to sue. Our whole legal system is founded on this concept.
I challenge you to watch or listen to one complete newscast and not hear directly or indirectly that some-one or something is to blame for the woes described. There is a talk radio host in Calgary who regularly asks his woe-of-the-day guest, “Who is to blame for your problem?” or, even better, “Who can we blame?” In-variably, the Victim has a long list. To be fair, this same host also asks what can be done to fix the problem. However, usually much more time and energy is spent on directing blame than on resolving the issues.

 

Our society has become skilled in establishing blame (victimization), often from the moment of conception:

  • She didn’t take her pills.
  • The condom broke.
  • I couldn’t interrupt the mood.
  • She trapped me.

And, all too often, it continues from there. In fact, one could argue that blame and victimization have sur-rounded us virtually from the beginning of history.

 

Genesis 3:11
And they heard the voice of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day; and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden. And the Lord God called unto Adam, and said unto him, “Where art thou?” And he said, “I heard Thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” And He said, “Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou should not eat?

 

This direct questioning by the Lord appears to have made our first parents very uneasy. Adam could have offered any number of reasons or excuses why he took the fruit. He could have said, Gee, the sun was in my eyes, so I couldn’t see what I was eating Or possibly a modern-day Adam would offer this justification: Sure I took a bite, but I didn’t swallow.

 

What would I expect Adam to say to this man who walked and talked with God, someone who held the honored position of being the first human on earth? I wish he had said, “I was wrong. I’m sorry. I will never do it again.”

 

Instead, listen to Adam’s immediate response, “The woman thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree. Adam is rationalizing his sinful behavior, trying to shift the responsibility to his wife, Eve. At this point, Eve has an opportunity to be a better human than Adam. However, her response to the same questioning is, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat. Pretty lame. The ten-dency of mortals to deny Personal Accountability seems to be evident from the very beginning.

 

Here is an interesting example of modern-day learning to blame. Close friends of ours have three kids. The middle child, Luke, is full of piss and vinegar like most boys. Luke loves skateboarding and gets a skate-board at the ripe old age of three. His Mom, however, is not quite as keen about the skateboard, because she is concerned that Luke will hurt himself. So she sits him down and talks to him about the dangers of skateboarding, reviews all of the safety equipment, and makes him promise to be careful. All is good up to this point. Then the inevitable happens. Luke has a dirty wipeout and scrapes up his face. He doesn’t cry and doesn’t run to tell his Mom because he knows that she will be even less willing to let him continue skateboarding. But Mom has witnessed the wipeout. Later that day, Mom asks Luke what happened to his face. His answer floors her.

 

To cover up his skateboarding drama, Luke decides that it is better to say that his older sister hit him! He has grown up in an honest and accountable house-hold, yet, at age three, he has already figured out that blaming someone else for his mishaps can provide him with a payoff and a protection. In this case, it did not work, but it does often enough in general, and he was sure willing to try.

 

Activity Learning to Blame
How did you learn to blame? What is your earliest recollection of blaming someone else? Were there any specific people or events that set up your patterns of blame? To learn more about Personal Accountability visit: http://www.personalbestseminars.com